ok what kind of idiot turns down casual afternoon sex?
ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
just had dinner with my dad's new gf and her daughter.. had to drink a beer to get through it.. she's 19 she has on a disney watch and snowflake earrings
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
I could only remember yelling "rip it down" as he ninja jumped off the bed, kicked the wall, and superman punched the fire alarm off the ceiling.
I've always wondered why you never put the hotel room in your name...
Drunk yoga at 11 am turned into me sitting on the couch making fun of the girl in the instructional video. By the way, what the fuck is a third eye?
Nope, can't do it. It's a snowball effect. Today, leggings as pants. Tomorrow, female hitler. Natural progression.
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
I'm in jersey with marbles.. He's blasted about to fuck a manatee and his entire family is trying to stop it. His mother punched me in the chest for not trying hard enough
She drank my rum. I had sex in her bed and didn't wash the sheets. We're even.
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
honestly, fuck you guys. i'm gonna get drunk by myself
Randomize
