What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
I knew I had to get an abortion when his toddler sister came up to hug my leg and I kicked her off saying, "Get off, fucker."
I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
I told the hostess, two bouncers and a manager i was roofied and made them smell my beer. Turns out I just picked up some stupid bitches CHERRY WHEAT beer by mistake. I insisted they replace my lost beer.
He broke up with his gf yesterday so he could give me our annual Christmas sex at midnight.
Marry him. Now.
Went outside and he was playing rock paper scissors with a cop over a drunk in public ticket.
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
He just kept mumbling that he was too drunk for society and then he peed in a bush
Eh. Fuck him. He's missing out. I'm legit naked and drinking straight from the bottle of wine.
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
Randomize
