he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
every time I worry about a career mistake, I remember Michelle Pfeiffer did Grease 2.
i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
Then I received a text in French, that roughly translated to "all you'll ever be good for is sex on the Internet"
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
Highlight of the night was you walking into the men's room yelling "My husband is diabetic" and crawling under the stall to yell at me.
You gave me your shirt to use as a napkin every time I spilled beer on myself. Before we went to the bar.
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
what are you going as for halloween?
drunk, naked, & emotionally unstable
It was a great party. People were literally still doing shots and playing drunk Jenga at 6am...
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
He and his ex stood there talking about going to get Chinese food while I was half naked searching for my panties
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
Randomize
