Eating a burrito bowl w/ queso sauce is about as cool as the first time you have sex w/ out a condom
he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
i knew she was high when she broke up the cookies into her glass of milk and ate it like cereal
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
Hashbrowns don't come out your nose as easily as you would think
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
Bartender just fed me brownie. Its going to be a good night
Hon, I found you crying into a bathrobe in the back of a closet with a broken shoerack.
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
my whole wardrobe smells like substance abuse
the texts you sent will act as the rosetta stone for all drunk people
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
A guy caught me talking to a sock today in the Laundry room if it makes you feel any better
Sadly that does. Why...where you talking to a sock
Bc I didn't know him and I asked him where he came from and why he was hanging out with my thongs
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
Randomize