he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
We did lines off of a Whitney Houston CD case. That makes everything okay.
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
I hit a child with a fudge sickle from a moving vehicle after he flipped me off, I feel like a God. Tell no one. My partner didn't see it.
after you left he started opening his bottles by smashing the neck against the edge of the fireplace and pouring beer into his mouth. it was about the manliest thing ive ever seen. its probably how lumberjacks open their beers... if they didnt have their axes handy.
Found my ex-boyfriend's money stash. Call the girls, we are getting fucked up tonight, my treat.
It was dumb but not something to force me into sobriety
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
I threw up in the bathtub last night like a decent human being.
You invited these random guys into your apartment that you met in the hallway...& then you started screaming at them to get out cause you didn't know who they were.
Not sure she's stomping around my apartment muttering incoherently about wanting to speak to the colonel
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
Randomize
