spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
So when we opened his headboard we found a bottle of crisco sitting on top of his porn magazines.
I guess we all know what he was cookin.
so he tried marking my clit with a sharpie so he could "find it again next time".
I woke up because I was nodding to the dream question of "would you like a sombrero?"
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
I was thinking about getting her an edible arrangement for an engagement gift. You want in?
I'm buying her a drink and not telling her to dump his ass. that's my gift.
She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.
Hey your work video crashed my computer. The 8 pornos running in the other window didn't. Congratulations.
He went to cum on my stomach and somehow it got behind my ear. He's like a fucking jizz Houdini.
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
Omg my butt feels so much better. Those suppositories are magic. It feels like Jesus fingered me in my sleep.
Drunk field day, hangover yoga and sober archery practice
I'm kind of upset that he wanted to have sex instead of watch Harry Potter. I mean it's Harry fucking potter.
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
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