she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
I was debating whether her purse was real then I saw her puke in it.
this morning i realized i came home with more condoms then i left. burn.
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
I dont care how high you are "yes" is not the correct response to "what do you want from Taco Bell" Mom.
Alright, deal. Settling two drug deals before noon is what I call a productive day. I'm not even gonna go to math, I've practiced enough numbers for the day.
I LOVE YOU SO MUCH I'M ON A WILD DICK CHASE FOR YOU. How many lesbians do YOU know that would do that? HOW MANY????
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
Who knew that "When in doubt, pelvic thrust" would end up being the best motto ever? In other news, I think I may have joined roller derby.
I think god invented us with two hands so we can grab an ass and spank it at the same time.
He was super stoned and then he compared doing meth to having anal sex and told me to "ride that cowboy." The cowboy being my ex.
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
They already have a joint checking account. She's got his balls in her purse! What's next, a shared Facebook account?
Did you really have to freak out and get up half way through to put the cat in the closet?
...
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
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