ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
You and I should start a club for people who woke up on outside on a bench with no idea how they got there.
standing in the yard with no pants on waiting for google maps to come and take a picture.
obviously my correlation between being a pro surfer and being extremely good in bed was 100% wrong.
Your braces fetish is going to end up biting you in the dick.
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
I'm applying temporary tattoos with green beer, this is the life.
I'll be spending 4/20 on a cruise ship, so i need a babysitter to make sure I don't reenact Titanic
I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?
Sober me does NOT approve of what went on in my pants last night.
...oh my god that's like anal suicide
I'm aware. I'm writing the eulogy for my colon as we speak.
Tried to ride the mechanical bull pants less, got punched for making out with some lesbians wife, and you tipped the bartender with a can of skoal.
I regret nothing
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
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