I hope mine doesn't look like that
I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
His text read: Sex? I replied: Not drunk enough. He bought 4 more rounds and tantalized me with the offer pizza later. This could be the beginning of a beautiful relationship.
I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
She's cute, but batshit. Like some kind of dominatrix disney princess.
Do you know how hard it is to put a bandaid on a vagina?
I swear, I make more use of my creative writing major with sexting than I do with anything else
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
He was 6'8" - I shit you not! He sat up in my bed and the ceiling fan got him right in the forehead.
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
Randomize
