guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
I hate thxgiving break now because that totally means I'm not able to have sex for a week.
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
the meat mosque collapsed into the alcohol moat
Precisely. She's an awesome drinking companion; yet, not so awesome mother-in-law material.
Do you have any idea how horrifying it is to hear your sister and her husband fucking then immediately go down stairs only to hear your parents fucking....... I wish I was Hellen Keller right now.
I'm glad you have such faith in my ability to find the worst situations with my vagina.
why did you put a dildo on the ceiling fan
the dildo had a suction cup and we had a ceiling fan what did you expect?
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
i'm at work, alone, drinking a spiced chai & fireball hot toddy. holiday OT isn't that bad after all.
should i feel bad about fucking you on my front lawn the day before you set me up with your best friend?
You know it's a good May 2-4 when it involves 14 straight hours of vodka slush and garlic bread
Randomize
