found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
Just waterfalled in the movie theatre... this is the beginning to a good night
She sucked my dick when I had a concussion. It was the coolest feeling ever but the doctor said it was a bad idea. He's obviously gay.
i literally paused in the middle of it, turned on my light, pointed to the picture netxt to my bed and go "you hooked up with my roommate too!!! AWWW!" he was so weirded out. i don't think he understands the relationship we have..we share..
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend
She had like a side ponytail and hoop earrings though. And legwarmers. Like a horrible 80s nightmare. Don't drink and dream, dude.
I got to her place and she was petting her cat and pounding vodka out of the bottle. She looked like Dr evil in yoga pants. She's nuttier than squirrell shit.
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
The taste of regret at 8am, yup that taste is Jack Daniel's
By the way, you're like fucking spiderman. I've never seen someone climb out of a car window that fast and eloquently.
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
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