Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
I never thought that I'd ever use the phrase "and the resulting ice cream explosion" seriously at work...
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
why did you let me tell everyone that you can get herpes from the ice luge and then let me do the ice luge?
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
I caught him with his head in the spinach bag this morning. He was laughing demonically saying, "i love spinach, yes I do."
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
Winning the lottery was the best thing that ever happened to my penis.
Greatest pickup line ever: "We are out celebrating winning the lottery."
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
My favorite thing about your netflix account "suggestions for you" section: Russias Toughest Prisons is followed immediately by Strange Sex
The attempted closet masturbation was unforgivable.
That was the most fucked up I've ever seen him. He had the fucking Canola Oil!
Opted for cash back rather than the 10% extra I'd get for store credit, solely for drinks tonight.
You're lovely.
Many a woman has been in tears over the passing of my penis' whorish ways.
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