I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
One little Beyonce reference and he turns on me faster than liberals on Jon Mackey
girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
then the nurse gave me a bag with my personal belongings: phone, wallet. jacket, keys and a BTB burrito
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
I feel like college is just one giant drunken trip to Taco Bell
I feel awful
Physically or morally
Physically. The only immoral thing I did was steal money from strippers while they gave me lapdances.
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
I only saw you for about 5 min, but you were rambling about how not even the whiskey could make you fight the skeleton guards.
That's like being smoked out by a unicorn. If the opportunity presents itself you fucking do it and don't ask questions.
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
I ACCIDENTALLY SUPER LIKED HIM. I JUST DELETED TINDER FROM MY PHONE.
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
It took him 15 minutes to put the condom on.
Randomize
