We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
New drinking game: take a shot everytime Jay-Z is played during the NFL draft.
Once you realized you couldn't finish the 30 you started walking down the street and leaving a beer in everyone's mailbox
More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.
I walked in on you eating olive oil off of a plate. you gave me this look and I just started crying. we were that drunk.
She kept saying the tortilla understood her. I honestly don't know where she found a tortilla at the pool.
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
He just snapchatted me a picture of his cock. The angle makes it look like a freakin skyscraper. Thinking of photoshopping a little monkey on it.
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
This country song on the radio just had a rap break. What. No. Why.
I've had your balls on my face a bunch of times so the least you could do is buy a girl some dinner.
My neighbor was my D.A.R.E officer and I feel like I've defeated him by smoking weed outside everyday
Randomize
