why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
she called for a booty call so i sent mike as my stunt double
I ended up with a bullet proof vest and I still don't know his last name.
We're sitting in his room writing songs about America. There's a verse about a dead dog. There's tequila everywhere.
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
Do you think I threw out my left shoulder during the keg stand or the stripper pole? It's medically relevant my chiropractor wants to know.
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
I like how our relationship transcends the borders of inappropriateness and encompasses all the colors of the inappropriate rainbow.
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
Shout out to my liver for being the true MVP. It easily put in more work than LeBron or Curry this week.
2017 is gonna be explosive... Already watching fireworks out the window while shit my brains out. Happy Ew Year
Being home for break is weird, just had a full convo with my dad about what I wanted for dinner, while a dildo was on top of me under my comforter
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
Randomize
