She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
My relaxing drive may end up as a surprise bootycall in Pittsburgh. Don't try to stop me.
Her vagina smelt so bad I lied and told her that I was married just so that she would leave.
I told him I'd go cook him breakfast, but ended up passing out on the kitchen floor in the fetal position spooning the dog
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
I'm eating a subway sandwich in the bathtub because I don't want to move. God bless boys from Brooklyn
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
He got in a fight. Then called me drunk to see if he should bail his friends out, or walk through a Taco Bell drive-thru. True love.
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
Hi I am on my way. I stopped and got the cheeseburger you asked for. Are you gonna pay me back?
Who is this?
totally just bought a bottle of gin with nothing but change
don't ever let anyone tell you that youre not 100% class
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