Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
Just burped. Tasted like beer and cherios...Beerios. This is gonna be quite a day.
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
Nothing like all your friends getting engaged to remind you how much fun sleeping around is.
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
I literally saw him try to open a beer can with his anus. We need o step up our game.
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
I'm drunk at a gay bar with my riding crop. God save the queens
Like what did he say to his host family? The girl I causally sleep with on the weekends is coming over?! And they thought "well lets feed her dinner"
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
i don't think fitbit tracks "flipping the fuck out" as activity.
Randomize