Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
110% paid for our cab with a lap dance
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
Where the fuck do you get consience sedatives from?
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
The sad part is I didn't even want to get laid. I just wanted the emotional connection, but my vagina was screaming "TOUCH ME. TOUCH ME RIGHT NOW BECAUSE MY DADDY ISSUES ARE MUCH DEEPER THAN MY EMOTIONAL NEEDS!" Vodka has a way of getting me out of my emotions and gets me fucked every time.
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
I refuse to believe you if you're trying to tell me humanity as a whole isn't sad, tired, and craving Chinese food.
I quit doing blow for him. If that doesn’t say “I’m in love with you and want to marry you” idk what does
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
So I guess I walked across campus with "pat my ass" in sharpie on my forehead.
You deserve it, you colossal cock block.
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