he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed
This is worse than the time I broke into Subway to steal bread.
I just need you there to slap my dick when im flirting with her
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
Some guy just stopped me in the bar and asked if I had a shot named after me at another bar called God damn my VaJana hurts? He already knew my name was Jana so I couldn't deny it!
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
Apparently I filled my purse with chicken nuggets and told my mom I was a "sexual squirrel."
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
Let's be honest dude, you almost cried when I gave you a handy, you are not ready for a relationship, I knew this.
Then you guys just all showered together...?
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
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