Haha so apparently that girl last thought I was you the whole time, and in the morning realized you weren't the one she fucked. Thanks for your help.
Having sex with her was like reading the Wall Street Journal.
i purposely bought her a small sweater. My way of saying, you've gotten fat.
When you wake up, I have rum and am in town
Tell me why Im cashing out of Walmart with Smirnoff and catfood
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
I've been ignoring his texts cause last night I put him in my phone as 'ignore for atleast a day' and I trust my drunk self.
Youll thank me when youre dead an dont have a cat eating your face
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
Randomize
