Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
She whispered into my eat that she wanted me to fuck her while her parrot watched...
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
afterward, he apologized, hugged me, and then gave me a granola bar and said “this is my apology gift.”
that's the best thing i've ever said to a penis
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
If your night didn't end with writing a witness report for the cops at a shwarma place, your night was probably less interesting than mine.
Tolerating him while I'm not drunk is like trying to find a word that rhymes with orange
I don't want to resort to having sex with people that actually like me.
Do you feel better now that you've sent me a picture of your dick?
Yep.
I yelled at him as he left "you broke up with me. You lost your blow job privileges"
Randomize
