My grandmass entire neighborhood is over for dessert and i'm high as fuck...about to make a couple of freshman boys real uncomfortable
Freshman in high school? Just your type
Remember that time i walked in on your friend taking a huge shit?
Remember that time you hooked up with him?
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
so he came in me this morning and i was like WTF DUDE. i called him Daddy until he agreed to pay the full $40 for plan B. He wants to name our Patrick because it will be a st pattys day baby. absolutely NOT.
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
I swear to God, I just heard my guardian angel tell us to stop. I think we should listen.
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
There needs to be a crayon color for how blue my balls are
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
I'm ready to run through the streets naked yelling "HES ALIVE!"
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