idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
meet me or not, i'm out of control
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
It'll be a Christmas-Fucking-Miracle if we get through the ceremony without a groomsman vomming
Then mom squeezed my boob and said, "Dad would go nuts if I had these..."
Letting two friends screw at my place in exchange for weed. This is my life.
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
The 3 year old I'm babysitting is the first guy to tell me he loves me sober in like 2 years
Omg that was my second thought of the morning.
First was that we had pop tarts.
I am about five seconds from ripping off my clothes and throwing myself into the ocean to become a mermaid
Tolerating him while I'm not drunk is like trying to find a word that rhymes with orange
I was so high I kept trying to flush the toilet with the light switch
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
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