But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
Hey when I die alone will you come by often enough so that my cats don’t eat my face?
i just sold a bong and some oregano to fifth graders for sixty dollars. doing something tonight?
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
I think being a buddhist has made me a better drunk
when i'm drunk i think im just gonna point at him and yell adultery is a sinnnn. youre going to helllll
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
the creek. my friends left me at a party next thing i know im in a breaststroke relay race with a bunch of randos in the dark
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
You had a hot dog outside the bar then made me stop at McDonald's for a double quarter pounder. I'd say you've more than filled your drunken meat quota.
I like to think it's an accomplishment that I can relate my life to a T-pain song
"I'm a professor to university students" I say as I realize I have a nipple piercing that I have no memory of getting
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