I just speedwalked down the broken metro escalator while high. Basically all my worst fears combined
The crowning achievement of my weekend was hooking up with someone I'm at least facebook friends with.
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
Finding an empty bathroom to shit on campus is like the quest for the fucking Holy Grail. Except with more stench and humiliation.
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
At some point, I’d like to pretend that his penis is a popsicle.
i almost got into an argument defending my life choices with a guinea pig eating chocolate cake at 4am
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
My plan to hit on all your friends went to shit after the 3rd dirty martini.
I hate when I'm sexting and I make a typo.
You just killed the sext mood.
Randomize
