Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
lady crackhead wearing pjs and a santa hat brushed the snow off my car at 7am saying "free of charge" the whole time
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
I'm all for hockey players but dude, he asked me to lick his chipped tooth mid-hook up.
That works. I won't care. I'll be a mermaid. Mermaids don't give a fuck.
Especially drunk mermaids.
I think it was a low point but honestly at this point I've had so many that my life is like a valley
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
Like seriously how stupid drunk do you have to get befor you start finding dolphin lighters and shit in your undergarments
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
She's better-looking with the mask on.
Randomize
