Having kids is risky. They might end up weird.
im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
it's like, God thought about making her pretty then changed his mind at the last second
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
Can we talk about the fact that I plucked weed off your ass this morning like it's a normal thing to do?
So like 5 seconds in I realize I knew him in 3rd grade and I went limp in his mouth. It felt like I just murdered the last unicorn ever. Going straight never felt like an option till now.
She just made out with a golden retriever. I'm disgusted and turned on all at once
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
Can I also remind you that we insisted on touching his mustache?
Well of course I remember it took up like 20 minutes of my night.
Her mom is a nurse who got called in to declare someone dead. Just got wing manned by a corpse.
So apparently I’m into choking now
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