Elton John & Lady Gaga just did a duet on the Grammies. How appropriate. He likes cock & she happens to have one.
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
The last text I sent him was about nachos. Frankly, if he can't respond positively to that he can fuck off...
Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups
I. recorded a message of me yelling at myself to "get up out of that bed" and set it an alarm. REALLY loud
Sometimes I'm sad but then I realize that bagels.
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
i love how you, my friend, sends me a picture of herself wearing a shirt that says "i am dead inside" and i'm just like "awww baby you're so cute"
that's just solidarity
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
It's only awkward the first ten minutes you realize it's not your house.
Just bedazzled a flask, while drinking out of it. Hot glue is EVERYWHERE.
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
Randomize
