you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
I don't even have to sign up for karaoke at duncans anymore. The karaoke ppl just sign me up themselves. Without my consent. I also sang stacys mom to some lady named Stacy who's mom died yesterday.
there are certain things about getting into a cab to go home at 630 am that make me feel like a prostitute.
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
woke up with the bag of wine duct taped to my shoulder.
I bought a dress specifically for face plant durability... this is how serious I am about my drunk status this weekend
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
Is this because I accidentally peed on you?
Why did I not realize how important my fridge was till I was drunk. It keeps all my food cold its like my own cold box
The amount of guys I've turned down for you is disgusting... You better love me.
Randomize
