her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
I just woke up and checked my e-mail, and apparently while drunk I bought a blowtorch. Thought you'd want to know.
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
You kept running up to random groups of people and saying "I'm a Dallas Cowboy Cheerleader so we all have to chug our drinks!" and they all listened to you.
I drink more single than I do in relationships. Except with assface.
Dude you're alone at a bar with a woman, and you're talking about my junk?
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
You had a hat of bras. Probably a good dozen, which is totally impressive for a Thirsty Thursday
We were all day drunk by 2pm. Now I know why they hate Americans
Dude fuck drugs. It's 4am and I'm eating mushroom ravioli fantasizing about jumping on a trampoline
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
As your friend, I promise I will drink a full bottle of vodka and belly slide down the stairs with you if that test is positive
You set a couch on fire in my brothers backyard?
Just the cushions
Randomize
