I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
Banging bitches in a bar bathroom is not legit as it was in college, there are no fistpumps afterward only shame
Things you are not allowed to do while im gone: sell cats on ebay, put cats in freezer again, shave cats like lions, dye cats pink/blue, try to light cats on fire to"wake them up from their nap" agian
he's washing the lighter in the sink and telling me to picture unicorns. requesting backup.
Like that girl needs to get her shit together. For her vagina's sake.
Him cheating on his girlfriend resulted in a $1500 hospital bill from repeated blows to his testicles by my ass. They diagnosed his pain as "testicle trauma". Sex karma at it's finest.
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
I am not betting on the failure of any friend that is not you.
What the hell man, you basically stole my girlfriend with a bucket of KFC.
At least you didn't get an invite in the mail to your fuck buddy's baby shower like I just did. My life is a sitcom
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
Randomize
