Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
I just told my parents that Capt'n Crunch does weird things to my mouth... my dad just stared at me
They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
They tried. Someone started to yell beer shower but he spun around and punched them in the mouth before they even finished saying beer. He's a fast little drunk.
Like for real, is your junk ok? I have to look after my investments.
I have three different pairs of earrings at three different houses including your 16 year old brothers nightstand. Look at my life. Look at my choices
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
Masturbating during the Olympics and cumming during the national anthem really is everything it's cracked up to be. Just thought you should know.
A bitchslap is in order.
Well that's very sweet of you. I have a strange feeling you're going to regret this when you sober up.
NO REGRETS FUCK DA POLICE
Just got done being naked and Mooning the cops. I'm still alive. Let's drink.
You ran outside mistaken the snow for sand and started screaming "WHERES TH BEACH"
Randomize
