I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
I couldn't tell you were laughing too hard
Dude I thought I set my hair on fire. I wasn't laughing I was screaming.
I'm always drunk lately
Now I'm in a game of hide and seek in Sears
Of course the first guy who sees my nipple piercings is a Catholic from Nebraska who won't do anything but dry hump me.
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
Just found dollar bills in my sheets. What part of the weekend am I forgetting?
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
At least he finally released me from his spooning oven of death...
Sorry, It's like OkCupid Olympics... categories: best sext, best dick pic, and most effort by ugly. You won gold in the last event if that makes you feel better.
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
Hey guys so who is Justin McGoo and why did I text him "fuck yooooouuu juuuustiiin mcgooo" at 12:06am on Thursday night?
Drinking and decided to streak in the apartment fountain. Canadian goose shit and sharp rocks on the bottom. I sobered up quick. That was a very bad idea.
My uterus just tried to get me to buy a tub of cookie dough
Ugh. I need to go to the store, but I'm too lazy. Whatever shall I do? That girls still passed out. I should steal her car
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