i only shaved half my leg
on purpose
I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
It's not my fault I help girls realize they're lesbians.
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
Maybe shotgunning 4 days after oral surgery wasn't such a good idea after all...
Fire alarms went off at reception of gay wedding im at. We all had to evacuate until FD got here. Then...ill just text the photos.
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
You know you're baked when you feel your throat closing up from an allergic reaction to the pecans in the cookie you're eating but you keep eating the damn cookie.
Yes, he does have a boomerang dick. No matter how many times I throw it away, it keeps coming right back and winds up hitting me in the head.
I'm so glad I was blacked out while I was going all exorcist in the bathroom. That's so not a memory I want.
I'm eating Swedish fish out of my boobs and watching SOA.. There is no way your Tuesday night will be better than mine.
Sorry for peeing on you and your bed last night.
It smells like grilled cheese and sexual frustration
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