I gave them both handjobs at the same time. Felt like I was skiing
There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
i don't know man, last time i saw her she was applying sunblock to her vagina
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
sometimes after I smoke and the high has gone away...the high will come back like three hours later for a brief yet gripping ride.
that's usually when I end up in someone's house, having sex with someone else, while that someone's roommate makes us mozzarella sticks.
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
Are you feeling okay?
Right now, not a single thing feels even slightly okay. That hungover.
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
Also I know you probably did not understand anything I said on the phone last night but thank you for pretending.
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
it's unicorns you uncultured swine
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
Puked in my purse on my Uber ride home last night. Safe to say it's not a good idea to beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
Randomize
