Katie is reenacting me jizzing in her eye via emoticons...
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
He told me he wants to eat me out all day while I lay in bed watching football. Seems like a solid foundation for a relationship to me.
She was just a sweet cute intern for us until I saw her naked in my bed the day after the Christmas party
I'm spending tomorrow with her. What should my ridiculous personal goal be? I've already got a blowjob while eating a cupcake
Oh shit. My drunken car sex is on Google Earth.
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
Do you always skip to "Baby Got Back" when fat girls show up at the bar?
I feel like an involuntary Mother Theresa. I DON'T WANT TO BE ABSTINENT!
My boobs are hoarders, they steal food and hide it. Greedy bitches.
You reached new levels of laziness. After we woke you up to take shots with us, you stayed in bed so you didn't have to move when you were drunk and sleepy
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
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