Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
Just found a bottle of tequila in the washer.
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
I'm at this kids house trying to figure out if I pissed in his kitchen new years eve. Lmao, stop letting me drink.
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
Just got convinced to trip sit for a pack of cigarettes and a burrito. Let the games begin
He is currently tell his hat to go free. Like he has it sitting on the table just waiting for it to take off. When he's not looking I'm gonna throw it off the balcony and tell him it's flying
Going through my purse trying to find money for this cab but all I keep pulling out if chicken from my burrito o ate an hour ago. Help?
Dude you asked your tattoo if it wanted to go swimming
I know you're gay. But if I'm not getting dick, then you have to. That's what friends do.
One of my life goals was never to see an uncircumcised dick. I guess that's out the window now.
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
dont ever go to laser tag drunk. you will be judged.
and then she asked if she could shave my junk
and howd that go?
can you pick me up from the hospital?
Randomize
