Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
I just woke up and i'm wearing a cape and it says sup slut on my ass
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
i think i gave myself a perma-hangover. or god just hates me.
I just realized I've stolen a hat from every guy I fucked. Except the last one. Maybe there is hope for me.
She was giving you that "I really want to blow you but I have to act professional" look. Guaranteed
I think they were cool with it, they should have know if I was the host of the baby shower it was going to involve a keg and jager shots.
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
We exchanged snapchat usernames instead of numbers. Is that what America has come to?
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
You know if we weren't hooking up I think we'd actually be friends
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
A girl in McDonalds just asked if I was in here wasted a few nights ago throwing fries at the staff, I said it was my twin
We both know that wasn't me
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