spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
fuck dude i blacked out on a tuesday. what am i doing with my life?
Winning.
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
She posts like 3 statuses a day pleading for pity. Responding positively would be like giving a dog a treat for shitting on the floor.
Was this before, or after you took my brand new bag of shredded cheese, and "Made it rain"?
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
how much ball-pain constitutes an emergency?
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
I just won a riveting game of "who can drink the most vodka out of a hollowed out watermelon". Fucking New Yorkers.
You told me to remind you that the bruise on your ass is from when you danced on the table at Ziggy's, saw a cop and tried to 'fly away'.
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
Well just saw that professor I hooked up with on campus and I look like a dumpster baby
your mom was just petting me...I am strangely comfortable with it
One day when i undoubtedly need an intervention please let it include lightsabers.
I think I can handle that.
Randomize
