I'm going to jail i love you
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
your philanthropy is ruining my sex life.
Don't know how I even got in. I pulled my id out and threw it at the bouncer, and he just picked it up, checked it, and let me in.
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
My mouth feels like I've been chewing on leather and firecrackers for the past 3 days
There's a black statue of liberty dancing on the side of the road. Please hold while I join him.
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
I feel like shit, and I can't get the band aids off my nipples.
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
As we were leaving a memorial service last night he turns to me and says, is it too soon for a post funeral blowie?
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
The cat just brought me a bottle opener. I think she's my soulmate.
I'd ask how but then you'd tell me.
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