I just got stood up by an 18 yr old. fmylife.
That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
my door was closed and her door was closed but even over the r.kelly playing at full blast i was able to hear her say "THAT'S NOT THE RIGHT HOLE!". Def rethinking my roommate situation.
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
you will always have a special place in my vag
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
i just traded 2 rolls of toilet paper for half a water bottle of vodka. i love college
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
I am 100% planning on being drunk on Wednesday. This is America. Work or no work.
I slept with one of the directors so you would get a good price on the ballroom for your reception. I'm the best MOH. You owe me bitch
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
Matched with the lumberjack. Here's your wedding invite.
I don't get a "my roommate is fucking you" discount?!
I cant promise hot guys but i can promise alcohol which is close enough.
They were playing some sort of fast food scavenger hunt game as an ice breaker. Some chick stamped a Starbucks logo on my hand and told me to go find the girl with the matching stamp and fill her with cream.
Dave had an Arby’s stamp and some sorority girl grabbed him and screamed “I’ve have the meat!”\n
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