i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
when we woke up the fish was dead lying next to us on the bed. wat should i tell her
If by any chance I go to the hospital make sure you stuff a pint in my pockets so I can keep up.
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
The hypnotist is here. He has a black eye and smells like tequila.
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
I want you more than I want a burrito.
I'm not as filling.
Like tbh you're not doing anything that screams I'm drunk and yet nothing says I'm going to spend $30 on McDonalds and make out with a stranger like that picture
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
Why do my weekends always degenerate into using my little brothers childrens board games for drinking games?
We played wedding bingo. I made out with the maid of honor and fucked one of the bride’s sorority sisters. But I needed to get with the groom’s cousin, a mother-in-law to be, or the wedding planner to win and I came up short.
Randomize
