Help i just walked in on mom blowing dad
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
I asked my mother if she peed on that chair, she said "not bad" There is no good level of pee on a chair.
1. No more tequila 2. Why do you let me say slutty things? 3. I woke up and our apartment was covered in cake? 4. Love you
My room should be renamed "Land of the Misfit Condoms."
Just bought a handle of vodka with the excuse of "just in case we drink tonight"
so hungover ... i gave my nephew five bucks to go blow bubbles for an hour in the kitchen.
He even wore it to bed. What the hell. He's too excited about that goddamn costume.
No one's ever called me intergalactic cocksucker, before.
What does it say about me that I feel completely charmed right now?
Did I, at any point last night, say I was dying?
I yelled out "blow jobs!" in my macroeconomics class. Ask me more about how my life is spiraling out of control.
He flipped me around so that we could have sex and both watch Die Hard... I think I found my sole mate. Merry Christmas to me!!🎄
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
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