Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
Ok. Also I almost just threw up. Seriously. I was think to myself "really? Here? Now? At my work desk?" and then it went away.
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
Nobody in the ambulance liked me...
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
Thanks for not locking your door. I had to pee and there was a random person throwing up in my bathroom so I used yours. \nPS I stole your soap
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
I'm pretty sure that I drunkenly used the phrase "I just want his beard all over my body" way too many times last night.
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
I just formed the "shit on a tree in Chicago club." And I feel awful about it.
We were making fun of some people having sex on the beach, an hour later we were having sex on a golf course
Randomize
