chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
Your the only friend that would realize I'm gonna get drunk and send coke to me at a bar before I made drunken phone calls for it. You sir complete me.....
Drinking with birthday clown in the backyard shed at a 5 year olds birthday party at 12 in the afternoon. My life doesn't need any adjustments
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
Did I crawl through the hotel lobby all the way to our room?
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
i woke up hungover wearing my gym shorts and the condom from last night. Wine bar thursdays rule.
A houseboat for a bachelor party is a terrible idea, we nearly die when on dry land, so how the hell are we supposed to survive a 3 day binge on a massive lake?
I'M SO WET FOR FREEDOM
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
Apparently I was telling them, "I AM A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN AND I DON'T NEED YOU TO HOLD MY HAIR," and I pulled my hair back and puked.
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
He wrote his entire dissertation last night. I can only imagine the frightening amount of headway he would make if he ever did things sober.
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
Randomize