Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
She just drank the vanilla extract. Again. AGAIN. No one should be that eager to get drunk.
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
Suppose hypothetically u received a request for face time communication with a gentleman who looked astonishingly like a penis. Would you indulge him in conversation? Hypothetically of course.
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
This bird just went for my eyes. Does he think I'm dead???
A guy from tinder a while ago who sent me dick pics straight out the gate is a tech on my dad's hospital floor. I was wondering why he looked familiar and why he never took my dads vitals when I was in the room
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
Idk if my headache is from the alcohol, the pot brownies, or being dragged down 8 flights of stairs by my ankles because i passed out in the 12th floor girls bathroom by you. Probably a combo of all three.
Please stop telling my mom she doesn't have nipples when she's been drinking. You know shell show you. Forcefully.
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