Dont touch anything! You just got rid of your crabs!
I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
I never thought to pass out in a hotel lobby rather then paying for a hotel room until you taught me that's acceptable at the Hilton
For the amount of money I just spent on my dogs toe, I could have fucked the entire B squad at a low end strip club.
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
Def don't remember taking those pics I sent you...but it looks like I was in a car? Shit. Looks like my Uber passenger rating just went up exponentially.
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
I now have a "weirdest thing a guy ever did in bed" story. Cut my fingernails.
Yeah I'm gonna need you to stop it right there.I know this is supposed to be a safe space but Imma have to exit.
she grabed my junk and started making lightsaber noises
I wonder if you could get her in a metal bikini
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
You know you're old when you’re masturbating and you pull your hip
Randomize
