I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
Best dream ever last night. You moved here. Your Spanish name meant highway. Your favorite food was styrofoam.
running the faucet water is not hiding the sound of you vomiting. fyi.
I don't care what we do tonight, as long as it makes me forget that my boyfriend just told me he likes taking it up the ass from big guys dressed as construction workers
Dont forget the glove box taco bell stash i saved for drunk us.
My phone saved "first signs of pregnancy" as a most visited search.
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
I'm done being drunk I wish I could snap my fingers and be sober
Um, when I went down on you it got stuck there. Still had gum in my mouth. Didn't exactly have use of my hands to assist
Well, why would you bring gelado into a strip club?
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
If there's one thing I think I could really excel it, it's curating a midlife crisis
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