haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
What would Jesus do? ... Jesus would slap a ho.
I just walked into his bathroom to see two poops floating... no toilet paper. WTF!?
He was eating me out on the dryer...and his mom walked in with her laundry basket...
He wasn't the only one with a full load.
that's the ideal party shoe. cute, but i can still puke in them.
I think I can smell my own vagina right now
I walked downstairs and there were 50 sorority girls. I wasn't expecting an audience during my walk of shame.
She kept saying the tortilla understood her. I honestly don't know where she found a tortilla at the pool.
we spent fifteen minutes trying to convince you that you weren't locked inside of your car
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
just remember the most important rule of taking psychedelics: monsters can't get through blankets
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
I climbed up on the tank of the toilet so I could take a slo-mo vid of myself pissing into the garbage can, but the base of the toilet shattered and I had to bail.
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
I couldn't really understand you because you were really quiet and I said "I don't know what you're saying, it's kind of a big mumble" and you said "that sums up my life"
Randomize
