Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
I just caught Brandon licking the fake chocolate on a smores ornament
What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
last night i found out that my 11 year old cousin used me as an example of what not to do in her D.A.R.E. speech. awesome.
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
I'm pretty sure every guy I've been with this weekend has made a solid attempt at getting me pregnant...
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
The struggle bus has heated seats and stops at Dunkin on Friday mornings so I'll be okay.
It's finals week and I'm halfway done with this bag of wine and don't plan on stopping. Say goodbye to my GPA
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
I learned the hard way a garbage bag will not save you when jumping from a tree at 2am
Randomize
