I woke up this morning and "The Wood" was on tv. Touche TBS, touche.
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
What's the appropriateness of putting a 50 cent lyric in my gmas eulogy?
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
We love you just as you are but we might love you more if we didn't have to post bail so often...
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
It's like... Even my horoscope knows I had an awkward threesome last night.
You just said you hate yourself then sent me a picture of your friend's penis. Clearly this is a night of honesty.
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
I want to get up and tell you that smells delicious but I'm struggling with the idea of pants
This is why I can't take dates to shows... I've literally made out with everyone in this band. And two of the guys in the crowd. And the bartender.
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
Somebody put William Shatner singing Bohemian Rhapsody on the jukebox, and the whole bar is about to riot.
Randomize
