Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
i think the doormans mad at me
well we haven't pretended to pretend we were going to have a threesome with him for a while...
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
Road construction signs are deceptively heavy
I'm sorry I make you whore yourself out to him everytime I'm drunk and want mcdonalds.
He just showed up at my house and was like "have you seen an axe laying around?" he wasnt wearing any shoes.
We stayed up until 4:20 AM. The next thing I remember was waking up at 4 PM, like my internal alarm clock knew.
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
My bra is still on the porch...I'm leaving it as a reminder to get my shit together.
Also one of my neighbors is blasting "pumped up kicks" and possibly butchering some chickens
My move is emasculating men with my superior intellect and it's not as charming when they can't see my huge rack.
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
STOP PUTTING BUTTER ON MY FUCKING CAT
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