You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
I'm not ok right now. I just walked in on a 600lb woman passed out on the toilet and she walked out and tried to eat her cell phone. I'm on acid I think.
if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
I just had to google "How do I get semen stains off of drywall." I'm relatively proud of this
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
Accidently said "your going to hurt the baby" when he got forceful with his thrusts. I guess I forgot to mention to him that we are pregnant.
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
What even was the context for that. All I have written down is "I would vote for President SnakeJaw."
Randomize
